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SAY YES! TO LIFE
Starting on The Path to My New Life
A century ago, or so it seems - actually 25 years ago - I was diagnosed with cancer.
My doctor performed a hysterectomy and insisted I start chemotherapy immediately.
Stunned, I sat there, searching for words. Finally I blurted out, "My mind... my mind doesn't believe in chemotherapy."
Without a pause he said, "Your mind has nothing to do with it. There are no other effective alternatives." Then he dismissed me with, "I know you're scared, but here are your chemotherapy papers."
At the shock of the revelation and my limited prospects, I was taken aback. My course of action was laid out in black and white. No negotiating. A doctor - who certainly knew far more than I about cancer - was telling me what was best. But still I kept thinking "Chemotherapy is poison and poison kills." At best, chemo seemed like a small bandage on an elephantine wound; at best a temporary solution.
Let me clearly state that I'm not condemning chemotherapy; I'm sure it helps thousands. I just had to do what I felt was right for me. This was not the first, but the second time, I'd faced the trauma of a cancer diagnosis. At the age of nineteen, when cancer was discovered in one of my glands, I was told I had a life expectancy of just two years. By changing my environment, I had surpassed that by twenty years. So years later, when the second round hit, I had more than an inkling of how taking charge of life could change the circumstances of one's life.
I Had, Unknowingly, Said "Yes!" to Life
What I didn't realize, at the time, was that I had already done the most important thing I could do. I had said "Yes!" to Life. I had stepped up and taken charge of the vision I wanted for my life. My true self was emerging as I made decisions based on my instincts and how I want my life to be, not on what someone else thought it should be.
"Courageous risks are life giving; they help you grow,
make you brave and better than you think you are."
- Joan L. Curcio
What I discovered along the way was that expressing my truth and being authentic to myself is the key to living fully. Rearranging my perspectives and priorities opened up for me a whole new world abundance, health and happiness.
Assertiveness Is The Hub
Through my twenty years of exploration and research, I grew to understand that assertiveness is the "hub" of the wheel of life. Assertiveness, this saying `Yes!" to life, is the key to a person's well being. It affects every aspect of life. Your level of assertiveness determines how well you eat, how much fun you have, how well communicate, how you develop loving relationships, and the amount of stress you have in life.
To be clear, I am not talking about fighting for life by become more aggressive. I did not fight cancer. I grew to love my cancer. There was nothing to fight for or against. Cancer, like all other experiences, provides an opportunity to stand up, take inventory, and appreciate your life.
The point is this: my perceptions of life and my preceding actions caused my cancer. I had, as a child, decided that the world was a hard place to live, and the best way to survive was to avoid problems, wait until the problem disappeared and/or just stuff my feelings of anger and frustration back inside. If I blended into the corner of the room, kept my thoughts to myself and nodded my head in agreement I wouldn't have to face the consequences of ridicule or physical abuse.
On the surface was a calm, passive and nice Judy. On the inside was a seething, desperate woman letting things eat away at her. You see, I thought being nice and keeping the peace was the answer to all my problems. It was how I had survived as a child. However, the "nice" youngster was not serving me well in my adult years. As strange as it may seem, keeping myself peaceful, making everything "nice" was really only keeping the peace from me. I was sending a message to myself and others that what I thought or said didn't really matter. Needless to say, the results flushed my self-esteem down the toilet along with my confidence and health.
It became apparent to me, over my years of workshops and personal consulting that some people aren't always ready to be introspective. It is either too much trouble to examine innermost feelings, thoughts and motives, or it's simply too scary. Even if these thoughts and motives are destructive, or life threatening, there are people who are simply not interested. Sometimes it takes a wake-up call or major event to jolt us into appreciating how astoundingly fragile, yet powerful we are as human-soul beings.
I am here to tell you that you don't have to experience a major catastrophe to comprehend the significance and power of your thoughts or to understand how this affects every aspect of your life. You can start right now to turn your life around and say "Yes!": Yes! to YOU, Yes! to YOUR LIFE.
Besides changing your mind and perceptions, another key component to saying "Yes!," to Life is your willingness to change your body and therefore your soul and spirit. Some people think that prayer or focused thought is all that is needed to permanently change circumstances. This is a mistake.
pg 11 makeadifference.com/SayYES |